Stop, Drop, and Breathe!

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One of my favorite tools for self regulation comes from my mentor, Dr. Laura Markham. She suggests we stop, drop our agenda, and breathe when we feel triggered or annoyed. Children are childish, imagine that!, and we will feel triggered! Here’s an example from my morning. After a mostly relaxing morning getting out the door, we hit a snag and were running a few minutes behind. As you can imagine, I was feeling flustered. It’s worse for me when things are on track and then go sideways vs an all over off-track start to the day. We were driving toContinue Reading…

Welcoming Tears

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Welcoming tears is a new concept for most of us. Tears are often not welcomed in our culture, our communities, or in our families. We demonstrate this in obvious ways when we tell children not to cry, or when we rush to get tissues when someone starts to cry. We give the person crying the message, “That’s enough.” I always cringe when a parent tells their crying and distressed child, “You’re fine!” I don’t know about you, but I am not usually crying when I am “fine.” I was called “too sensitive” as a child and heard those familiar refrainsContinue Reading…

The Best Podcasts for Kids!

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Quite often, I consider going back to a flip phone (do they even make them anymore?) because I wonder if smartphones do more harm than good because of their power over all of us. Of course, actually giving up my iPhone would require a lot of sacrifice. The primary reason that I could never give it up are podcasts. My name is Lisa and I am a podcast addict. If we have a personal conversation, chances are good that I will bring up a podcast episode that you *have to* listen to or recommend one specific to your interests. IContinue Reading…

The Case of Accidental Empathy

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The grocery store nearest our house has my daughter’s favorite carts. There are standard shopping carts with an addition at the front turning them into a race car, a taxi cab, and a fire truck. We do not shop here often so she is always especially happy to find that we need to pick up a quick thing or two from the comfort of her pink race car. We stopped by for only four things and I anticipated a quick in-and-out trip. This store also has a wide and quite amazing selection of balloons. There’s one in particular that myContinue Reading…

What is parenting coaching?!

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It has been my experience that parenting is the hardest job there is! I know that is also true of the parents I work with and others I talk with in the community. I am always reminded that any other job we have provides us with training, support, and often a mentor to help us learn the ropes, figure out what to do, and how to handle tricky situations. But we don’t get that as parents! Perhaps you took a childbirth class while you were pregnant and prepared for the birth. But how many of you were offered a classContinue Reading…

Play Is The Work Of Children

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“How much do I have to play with my children?” “To be honest, I don’t really like playing…” I hear these sentiments regularly and think that they are common questions and feelings for many parents. Play does not come naturally for many of us – myself included! But even if you are a parent who comes to me for coaching and tells me that you don’t love playing, I can tell you this: You can do anything for 15 minutes a day. What we know for sure about play is that it is one of the easiest ways to connectContinue Reading…

Getting Comfortable With Feelings

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The researcher Brené Brown has found that the average adult can only identify three feelings. To have real emotional intelligence, however, we should be able to identify thirty feelings. Why is there such a huge gap between what we know and what we should know — and how do we begin to bridge that gap? How do we become more comfortable talking about our feelings? I would not be surprised if reading the word “feelings” four times already makes you want to stop reading this column, but please stick with me. I promise it will not hurt. Emotional intelligence isContinue Reading…

Resolve To Connect More

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As 2016 drew to a close, I heard people all around me saying the same thing: “I am ready for this year to be over.” My friends and family, people out in the community, and even strangers in the grocery store remarked to me that 2016 had been a tough year. The election took a toll on all of us no matter our political views, there has been so much loss, and the world seems overwhelmed by tragedy in every corner of the globe. It had been an awful lot to take in. I did not blame anyone’s desire toContinue Reading…

Maintaining Connection Over The Holidays

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Parenting is 80% connection and 20% coaching. When I begin my Peaceful Parenting 101 classes with that statement, which was first shared with me by my mentor Dr. Laura Markham, I see a lot of confused looks back at me. Sometimes we all forget that beneath all of our daily ups and downs, parenting is simply a relationship between an adult and a child. When you break it down to that – a relationship – then it makes sense that it is about connection. If I suggested during class that the basis of your partnership with your spouse or yourContinue Reading…

Welcome

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I’m Lisa. You can read more about me here. I am a Certified Peaceful Parenting Coach. You can read more about coaching here. I work with parents to help them become the parents they want to be – more peaceful, patient, and connected with their children. I also teach workshops both locally in San Diego, California and online about Peaceful Parenting, for upcoming classes take a look at the event calendar here. In this blog I will be sharing different ideas about parenting: some old, some new, some traditional, and some that might take you a moment to wrap your headContinue Reading…